Friday, September 16, 2005

The Squirrel

My friend MrsMayhem says that she lives through her children. Typically, I think my cousin is living through mine. But this week was different. This week she auditioned for a play. But before I continue with that story, let me give you some background info.

I love to act. I always have. I suck at sports. I always have. Acting is my thing. So in 6th grade I tried out for the school play. The lead was Calamity Jane, and I auditioned for it. I will never forget the moment the call came saying that I got the lead. Needless to say, I was a wonderful Calamity Jane and gave the performance of my life.

One year later, I was at my grandma's and she was watching the news. I saw that the local theatre Black Hills Playhouse was holding auditions for something. I was ready. I told my mom and she drove me to the audition that Saturday. All the kids had radios and walkmen. I had no idea why. Then they called my name. I went in and they asked what I would be singing. Hmmm, singing. Did I mention that I'm tone deaf? I didn't know anything about auditions, and didn't know that songs were required. They played Happy Birthday to You on the piano and I sang, in a quiet, and very embarrassed voice. The letter came a week later letting me know that I was not chosen.

Fast forward 15 years. My daughter, (I swear on her own), decided that she wanted to try out for a play. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. I nervously agreed. I didn't want her to get the letter that I got. So, we practiced her song for a month. My cuz came over to help her with her "moves". (Did I mention I also suck at dancing!) We were ready. I told her to count this as a practice audition- don't sweat it if you don't get in. And after seeing the rehearsal schedule, I was thinking it would be just fine if she didn't. I tried not to be pushy. I don't want to be the typical stage mom.

Alaina got up there and sang okay. The night before she was incredible. She also watched others audition who sang REALLY well. (Singing is not her strong point.) Up until that point, I thought my daughter was the best actress out there. I'm her mom. I guess I'm supposed to feel that way. I was worried. Then, at midnight, they called. She was to come back and do more dancing and singing. Yippee! They must want her to be an Oompa Loompa! Chia was ready to wear green wigs to the play. I was excited. Then Sunday they published the list. Her name was not under oompa's. I was shocked- devastated for her. I really thought I would be happy. Then, right before we closed the browser window, we saw her name. She was...A squirrel? If you haven't seen the new movie the squirrels are the ones that throw Veruca down the trash shoot. Hmmm, I wasn't sure if this was any better than not getting in. Now we have to spend time and money for a crappy role. (BAD attitude, I know.) I smiled my biggest smile and told Alaina the GREAT news. She wasn't sure about her new role for a few minutes. Then she smiled her most evil smile and said "Good, then I get to throw Veruca down." (Did I mention that Alaina wanted to be Veruca, but gave up hope when we saw a girl at the audition that looked JUST like Veruca, and sang REALLY well. Alaina instantly hated her. Deep down, I did too!)

So I smiled and acted happy all week. Really I was bummed. Did she not dance well? Does she really suck and I can't see it? "She's just young, this will be a great experience", I would tell myself. Really I was thinking what a pain in the butt it would be. Then I went to the parents meeting. I sat there pouting and wishing I was somewhere else. After the meeting, I watched Alaina at her first rehearsal. She was smiling and having a great time. She was a happy just to be there. My attitude changed. I became the person I wanted to be. I was PROUD of my little squirrel. When she came out of the room I hugged her and asked her all about it. My steps were lighter and I was proud of my self for my change in attitude. Then Alaina told me the sweetest words she could have ever said to me. "Mommy, you know that girl that we just knew would get Veruca? She's a squirrel with me, and she's actually nice." I felt myself smiling my evil smile, (the same one as Alaina's), and inwardly rejoicing that she didn't make Veruca either.

25 Comments:

Blogger MsMayhem said...

I love it!! Hurray for the squirrel!!

10:55 PM  
Blogger Stephanie said...

Yes, but they are the ONLY "animal" in this play. By the way, would you like tickets??? :)

You have to come and see the amazing squirrel

8:28 PM  
Blogger MsMayhem said...

This will be her debut you can bet on that. How was your weekend??

7:36 AM  
Blogger f o r r e s t said...

So it begins...I wonder when the jealous parent syndrome will hit us.

Have you ever seen a squirrel poop? I haven't. Thank goodness they don't poop from the trees or else we might get hit. Do squirrels lift their big bushy tail up like a dog when they poop? Alaina should study the squirrel so she can really get into the character.

8:02 AM  
Blogger MsMayhem said...

I am laughing so hard picturing Alaina trying to figure out how a squirrel poops........

8:26 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I couldn't find information as to how, but here's the poo info I've gotten. I will be sure to inform Alaina that she must now have small poop.

Squirrels, like all rodents, have very small droppings. They are about the size of a raisin, and light brown in color. Since the squirrel is outdoors, and always moving, they can be difficult to find.

10:12 AM  
Blogger f o r r e s t said...

As we were sitting under a very tall tree at the movies friday night, I looked up and thanked the good lord that squirrels don't poop from tree or maybe they do? I know you go to watch out for the birds.

That m&m did taste a little funny!

10:44 AM  
Blogger MsMayhem said...

You two are hillarious!! There is someone weiting on my blog and I have know idea who they are?? They go by captain Easy.. I am so intrigued.......

10:58 AM  
Blogger Stephanie said...

Which one of the following things did not happen on Friday.

1. Forrest ate squirrel poop after mistaking it for an M&M......

11:40 AM  
Blogger Stephanie said...

More pointless squirrel poop info!

Question
I attend San Jose State University in California, a campus built in the middle of a big city. On campus, there are a LOT of squirrels everywhere, and you would probably see one every 20 feet you walked. Today I read a comic that cracked at joke at this \"How come there isn\'t squirrel poop just absolutely everwhere?\"

I never thought about that before, but I am curious now. I don\'t believe I have seen any droppings left behind by squirrels before; why is that?

Thank you.

Answer
Dear Victor

Thank you for your unusual question.

Squirrel droppings are very small - they are 5 mm long, about the same size as a raisin. They are also light brown and a similar colour to soil, so are hard to find. I should imagine that many of the droppings are trodden on before they are seen by people.

Generally speaking, tree squirrels leave their droppings anywhere, so there are not large concentrations of them, which people would be more likely to notice. Flying squirrels have a designated place where the droppings will accumulate, but I guess that the squirrels you are seeing on your campus are tree or ground squirrels and are not flying squirrels, which glide betwen trees and rarely descend to the ground.

Some squirrels may leave their droppings in hollow stumps - and I suspect there are not many people who look in hollow stumps, never mind people who look for squirrel droppings.

I hope that this answers your question - basically, the small droppings are so like soil-covered raisins that they don't really look like droppings at all.

All the best

Jonathan

11:43 AM  
Blogger f o r r e s t said...

Exactly!
Go to any park with a lake and geese that hang out and the ground/sidewalk is covered in their poo poo! It's gross!
But not with the squirrels. cute little turds.

12:49 PM  
Blogger f o r r e s t said...

Seminole, is this blogs stuff keeping you from your studies? Or have you found a good balance?

12:50 PM  
Blogger MsMayhem said...

Ughhhhhhh!! I am going crazy trying to figure out who this person is!!!

1:36 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

hmmm, I think it's balanced. But I think it should be tipped more in the favor of studying. I read 10 pages, then blog. Study some online material, then blog. In reality, i have no time to blog. I have to behave now...A&P is calling my name

1:52 PM  
Blogger Stephanie said...

Thanks for the picture Forrest! I'm frightend to think of what else you could put on here now that I've given you the power!

3:48 PM  
Blogger MsMayhem said...

great picture- looks like home...

4:33 PM  
Blogger Stephanie said...

yes it does. :)

4:51 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Next Monday, I want the info!

8:02 PM  
Blogger MsMayhem said...

how did you do the pic of mt rushmore?

8:53 PM  
Blogger Stephanie said...

Forrest did it. He loves me.

9:10 PM  
Blogger MsMayhem said...

Forrest, can you help me?? You don't have to love me. Just help me.

9:34 PM  
Blogger f o r r e s t said...

Don't worry Seminole, I did nothing else to your site. I thought about it, but didn't want to abuse the power you intrusted to me. I would have like to have found a funny picture of you, but this will have to do until you change it.

Mrs. Mayhem, do you need help with a profile picture. Just go to the spot where you edit your profile and there shoud be spot that lets you add a profile picture off the web (URL). If you want one of your own pictures, post that picture in the blog, then copy its web location and paste that location in your profile where it ask for a picture from the web.

I hope that makes sense, cuz it sounds confusing to me.

6:32 AM  
Blogger Stephanie said...

I'm waiting for the picture with the cheese puff to show up...

6:18 AM  
Blogger f o r r e s t said...

Your wish is my command!

6:25 AM  
Blogger Stephanie said...

that wasn't a wish! I take it back!

7:30 AM  

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